Eulogy | Donna Christianson's Speech Writing Source

One of the hardest things to write can often be a eulogy. If you have been asked to write a eulogy for someone the chances are that that moment in your life can be very difficult and the last thing that you might want to do is to write a speech. A eulogy is usually a well-written speech that goes over the life, memories, and cherished moments in a passed loved ones life. By writing a eulogy you will be able to honor their memory and keep that person in the heart of every attendant at the funeral.

Reasons to Write a Eulogy

Writing a eulogy can be difficult to do but remembering who the deceased loved one was and what they accomplished in their life will help you to write a speech from the heart. When you are writing a eulogy speech there is no need to sound like a professional writer or proofread your speech constantly. The best eulogy speeches come from the heart and are written or spoken in your voice.

One of the biggest reasons that you should be cherished to be asked to write the eulogy is because the eulogy tells all the big moments, memories, and generally tells the life story of the loved one. Always make sure to tell precious memories, whether they happened with your or not, to help keep their love for the deceased still alive. A eulogy is a great way to help people to grieve for their loss while accepting the fact that they did live a great life and they will always be remembered for that.

Always Have a Backup Plan

A eulogy can be a difficult speech to write but it can be manageable. On the other hand giving the eulogy speech in front of dozens of their closest friends and loved ones can be hard. Depending on how close the loved one to your heart you would want to keep some Kleenex’s around. Another great strategy for giving the speech if you are unable to finish it is to give the speech to someone who was also closed with the individual that passed and have them continue where you cut off. Having a backup plan is not a bad thing and in some circumstances it can be necessary.

Coming Up With Ideas for a Eulogy

There is no right or wrong way to write a eulogy and you don’t have to have a college degree in English to write the best eulogy for them. A eulogy is a speech that comes purely from the heart and tells the tale of the loved one that passed. If you are having a hard time trying to come up with ideas for the eulogy below are some great options to choose from if you find yourself getting stuck or choked up.

Ask the loved ones friends and family for more information on them. You may feel as if you know the deceased well but by asking for different points of view you will be able to get information to add to your speech that you might not have known before including some great new memories. Find out where they grew up, how they lived, and how that person came to be the person that they were.

By doing the proper research on the loved one that passed you will be able to create a richer speech that appeals to the general audience and not just you. Funerals tend to bring in people from many different locations that knew the deceased in one way or another so by incorporating numerous different aspects about their life you would be able to incorporate memories that they might have had with them.

Another great way to get more ideas for a eulogy is to take pictures and other items of theirs and study them. Put the photographs down in front of you. What emotions do they reveal? What are the memories behind each one of those photographs? What was so special about these photographs that the loved one kept them? By using this method for brainstorming you will be able to dive deeper into their lives and bring back memories that people might have cherished or forgotten.

Write the Eulogy from Your Heart

Writing a eulogy for a loved one that passed can be difficult. There are many people at a funeral grieving over their loss. Take the time to write the eulogy speech from your heart instead of writing the first thing down. A eulogy is a great way to remember an individual for a long time to come and by choosing the right words or memories to put into a eulogy you are setting the mood for how they will be remembered.

Know Your Time Limits

Throwing a funeral can be a difficult job to put on any family that is dealing with a big loss in their life. In many funerals the eulogy speech is only given a certain amount of minutes to be read and you would want to make sure that the speech that you have written falls in that time frame. Practice in front of a mirror or in front of a friend or family member to get the speech just right.

Find a Eulogy Example to Reference

If you were the one asked to write the eulogy speech than finding an example can be a great way to see how others have written out a eulogy. There is no right or wrong way to write a eulogy but taking in some of the different ways that others have written their speeches before you will give you an idea on what to do. There are some downloadable examples that are available online that will help to guide you through the writing process, give you eulogy examples, eulogy samples, examples of eulogies, and even specific eulogies such as eulogy for father. They will give you advice on how to write a eulogy and offer for you to view a funeral speech that worked well in the past.

Writing a eulogy can be hard but it can even be harder if you are unaware of the different processes that need to be taken. By using an online downloadable eulogy writing product you will be able to figure out what aspects need to be covered but you will be given the general guidelines and rules that would need to be respected in the speech. These downloadable information packets will give a eulogy writer most of the information that they would need to know in order to write the perfect speech including a eulogy example.

The passing of a loved one is a difficult point in time in many individual’s life and having to write a eulogy speech on top of a loss can be a difficult burden to bear. By using different tips, advice, and hints that are available in a downloadable product you can use the eulogy example to get the right points across. Memories are the most important thing to add to a eulogy speech because oftentimes those memories will be the only thing that is remembered over time about the loved one that passed. Make the speech come from the heart and use it to commemorate how far they went in their life and what they did to influence and change many people’s lives.

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Writing an eulogy doesn’t have to be complicated. Remember that what you’ve been asked to do is an honor, a privilege and your eulogy should be written as a tribute to the deceased person’s life. Begin the eulogy by introducing yourself and how you fit into the deceased life. If you are speaking on behalf of others, acknowledge them and thank them for the honor and privilege to give the eulogy. Depending on the length of the deceased person’s life, there may be so much that can be written about and it is hard to put a person’s life into ten minutes of a speech. So just begin by saying something like, “________ lived a long life and has so many things I would like to speak about but time is limited so I will speak on the many highlights.”

What To Include In a Eulogy

Every individual has their accomplishments and the good things they have done in life; they also have disappointments and bad things that they have done. The old saying, “If You Can’t Say Something Nice, Then Don’t Say Anything At All,” can certainly apply when writing an eulogy. An eulogy is not the time nor the occasion to talk or speak of family resentments, anger moments and the like. The eulogy is a reflection of that person and good, interesting family stories about their loved one will help relieve their grief and sorrow. The family stories will show the uniqueness and special person’s character. When speaking take care to celebrate the life, talk about the persons strengths, and joys in life. When you know and have been close to the person it will be hard to deliver an eulogy because you are most likely hurting too. So to make it easier on yourself, preparation ahead of time will allow your speech to flow smoothly. Preparation allows you to say what you want and how you want it to be said. Preparation will help you speak clearly and you will be able to share what you wanted to say.

Delivering the Eulogy

Also consider the tone of your voice as you deliver the eulogy. When a comment is humorous have a lighter tone. It is okay to laugh, to cry, to smile and show emotions because emotions is a part of our lives. Expect those in the audience that are upset or crying and try to keep your composure as you deliver the eulogy. Ask for a lectern or speaking stand to place your notes upon. This will eliminate your being so nervous that you drop the pages, or rattle the paper. Be sure to use a basic, easy to read font and double space the text. Staple the corner of the pages for easy turning. You definitely want to make the eulogy easy to see and read as you speak. When you speak don’t sound like your reading text but rather life you are telling a story and show character in your voice tone. Maintain eye contact with your audience and be sure to look forward at the audience towards the back row as this will help hold their attention. It is okay for you to have tears or falter for a moment after all we are human and when we know the individual personally, we are grieving too.

When You Don’t Personally Know The Person

In the case when you personally do not know the individual, talk to the parents, siblings, family and friends. Have them tell you about the fun, happy times and the individuals accomplishments in life. Have them include standout memories and highlights about the person. When and where the person was married, to whom and if they had children. Be sure to read off the children’s names in the order of birth.

You can take the notes shared by parents, family and friends; and build an historical timeline of events during the life of the individual. Where did they live? What was happening in the news? Research using the internet and find out facts and history during the persons life. Include where they went to school and what type work they did. Find out when or if they were military and any honorary presentations. Include community volunteer clubs and associations. When you write the eulogy make sure to make it personal and lively so it doesn’t sound like a resume.

Additional things To Do To Make The Eulogy Interesting

If they have special pictures, consider making a video or a power point slide presentation of the person that includes special background music. The video will become a lasting family keepsake memento for future generations to enjoy. The video or seeing the pictures and learning about that person will help to bring that person and their memory back to life.

Acknowledgement of The Person[s] That Asked You To Do The Eulogy

If you are asked to give the eulogy for a business associate at work, it can be challenging to write about someone you only knew by association at work. So, don’t try to personalize the eulogy and write about the information you know about. You may include the fun, humorous happenings at the office and the accomplishments in business. After speaking with family and friends use their comments to help introduce the person and their personal life to the business audience. Briefly include major accomplishments of their everyday life. Make sure to praise and honor the person in a loving, kind and honest manner.

Final Suggestions

A eulogy that is well thought out and prepared ahead of time will eliminate mistakes and can be a final lasting memory for that individual. Preparation beforehand will allow the speaker to be ready to speak thus the eulogy will flow smoothly. Make sure the eulogy is uplifting and a blessing to the individual’s life. Most eulogy speeches will last about ten minutes and the material you speak about needs to last about that time. Practice the eulogy until you feel confident in the content and your ability to deliver the speech. The more confident you are, the better your ability to control your emotions and speak with confidence.

End the eulogy by speaking about endearing thoughtful comments made from those that knew the person best. Explain that you know being asked to speak was an honor and privilege and briefly talk about the importance of the person in your life. Thank your audience for their trust in you at such an important part of a persons life and let the audience know you’ve tried to do the best you could.

These helpful suggestions will help you learn and know how to write a eulogy.

Writing a eulogy for your dad will probably be one of the toughest things that you will ever do. That is especially true when a death comes suddenly and without much warning. It is not easy to write about someone right after they pass away and it is much harder when it is someone as close to you as your father and considering that that is not the only thing that you will be doing at this time, the memories can end up making the experience feel even worse. However, it is your responsibility to write the eulogy for father. You may be inclined to look at eulogy examples to create your funeral speech but there are things that you should be focusing on to get it right.

1. Use The Net
The internet has made a lot of things easier and eulogies are no different. You can find eulogy samples on plenty of websites, but there are even better ways to write a eulogy. Some websites have amazing software or courses that you can look at in order to write the perfect eulogy. This type of help is great because it allows you to organize all of your ideas and to not leave anything out of your speech. If you can get the help in writing a eulogy from a website like that, then it is highly recommended that you do so as this time is already hard enough that it is easy to forget a few details.

2. Talk To The Family
Your family will be able to give you ideas so that you can write the best eulogy. Talk to them and get their own stories about your father. You would be surprised at the things you find out. Everybody will feel like they are participating in honoring your dad if you include stories from everyone in your speech. Your siblings, their siblings, spouses and anyone who can give you ideas should be talked to. Take note of what the people in your family tell you as the details are important and you will need them if you are including any of those stories in the eulogy.

3. Do Not Be Too Funny
When it comes to eulogies, a lot of people think that being funny is a good idea as it could lighten the mood. While you should not be all serious about what you say in your eulogy for father, telling too many jokes could end up offending some of the people who now are mourning. The best thing that you can do is to tell a slightly funny story about your father; something true and that people would know him for. You do not want any joke that makes fun of him but rather something smart or funny that he said at one point.

4. Get The History Right
Important dates are crucial but you should not be telling a date or time with every fact that you say. The facts and dates are great for framing the story you are telling. Anecdotes can help a lot and you will notice that when you look at examples of eulogies. If you are not sure about a couple of things in the speech, then it is a good idea to ask someone else to verify or correct the information that you have.

5. Get The Names Right
Another thing that you have to get right when writing your speech is the names of the people involved in a story. This is probably more important than a date as it can be someone that is the audience. If the names cannot be verified by the people attending or your family, simply leave the names out. Instead of referring to someone by a name such as Mike and Barry, just say “a couple of his friends.” That will make the story seem right. It is always important to do your homework when it comes to researching the facts.

6. Organize Yourself
One of the things that you will not see in a eulogy example is the fact that you have to organize yourself. It is still, however, very important that you do so. This is the time to go back to your high school or college days when you would use note cards for your ideas. You should always have someone check your eulogy with you. That way you will ensure that you are prepared and that you have your facts correct. It is also a good idea to have a person read the eulogy to you so that you hear what it sounds like before you make your speech.

7. Do Not Wing It
Giving a eulogy for father is an honor that you should not take lightly so the last thing you should try to do is to wing it. Keep in mind that this is a very hard time for you and your family so if you try to wing it without preparation, you could end up making mistakes or saying things that you did not want to say. You could also leave out good details that you could otherwise have shared with the people attending the funeral.

8. Have A Backup
Once you have written the eulogy, you should make sure that you have a few copies just in case one is lost. It happens many times that a eulogy will get misplaced but if you have copies with you or with other people, you will ensure that it does not happen to you. It will be a good idea to have one with a close family member and another one with the director at the funeral home. You will not want to write a great speech just to leave it at home.

9. Have A Backup Speaker
As stated earlier, this is a very hard time so you should be prepared for everything. It is very easy for someone to cry and break down while giving a eulogy and because of that, you should be looking for a backup speaker. You should find someone that can take over the speech in case you cannot finish it. When you are prepared like that, you could be in fact reducing the chances of a breakdown and it will take some of the pressure off. If you do end up not being able to finish the speech, then the other person should be ready with a copy and they should have practiced the speech at least a couple of times just in case.

10. Do Not Offend
If you can get a list of the people coming to the funeral, then it would be a good idea to take a look at it. If your family is Roman Catholic but people of other religions are coming, then try to only use religious speech when absolutely necessary. Your father’s religion will probably be displayed in the funeral services but your own speech is there to talk about them personally and to uplift people’s spirits. It is very important to learn how to write a eulogy because it is a speech that everybody will remember. Try not to portray mourners or your father in a negative light as some people may even leave the service feeling worse than they did before.

Delivering a eulogy is an honor, albeit a difficult one. If you are facing the challenge of putting together words to say goodbye to someone, a trusted source of reliable information will help you prepare an appropriate eulogy.

Examples of Eulogies By Type

Although there are several eulogy types to use, there will probably be one that stands out as your most obvious choice. Look for eulogy samples that seem especially fitting to the deceased and use that type as a guide. Many tools are available to narrow your options and craft a suitable remembrance; availing yourself to them early on will give you more time to etch out each important fact and relevant detail. In general, the specific types are as follows:

A Personal Recollection – This is the most common type of eulogy and often the easiest to compose. It focuses on the special memories you have of the deceased from your unique perspective. This type of rendition is often the most difficult to get through, as the words evoke poignant memories and the pain of loss.

A Chronology - The chronological eulogy will memorialize the life of the deceased based on a time-line of defining events. A funeral speech focusing on the chronology of the deceased should begin with a summary of the upbringing, include challenges overcome and end with accomplishments or the ongoing vision held. For example, someone who came from very humble beginnings and went on to achieve success against all odds would be well represented with a chronology.

A Tribute -  This particular eulogy will highlight the major accomplishments of someone’s life, what they have given to the world and all they leave behind. Such an honor can be appropriate for just about anyone; search for tribute examples that demonstrate how to exemplify the life led and the significant aspects of it, especially how others will continue to be touched by the legacy of the deceased.

Theme-based - This eulogy uses a particular topic or association that was of high value to the deceased. It can include anything from a certain religion, political party or era in history that may have been of great influence. As a theme-based eulogy example, if the departed was a particularly devout Christian or fiercely supportive of the Republican party, your eulogy can center on that topic. Humor, art, charity and specific music are also examples of themes that could represent the passion of the departed.

Elegies - This unique way of memorializing someone is poetic in nature and given in three distinct parts; a lament, praise and the consolation. Each verse is a tribute and expression of the loss felt by those in remembrance. Elegies are somewhat rare, however; with proper structure and delivery, they can be a very fitting way to commemorate someone special.

Whatever eulogy you decide on, make sure you have the proper guidance in prepairing it. The more confident you feel in the eulogy, the more powerful your delivery of it will be. A eulogy for father, for example, needs to be fitting to both his life and your perspective of it, otherwise it may not feel right or sound natural. Represent your feelings and the person being eulogized harmoniously.

Tip: Do not just look online for something to insert your loved one’s name into; find a site that helps you to create a special eulogy unique to the deceased and worthy of the life they led.

Choosing Words and How to Deliver Them

Let the words come from your heart without a lot of editing for aesthetic purposes. Keep the sentences short and succinct and write to the tune of how you would normally have spoken with the person being eulogized. Some helpful things to remember include:

• Open your eulogy with an anecdote or story that epitomizes the character of the lost loved one.
• Find samples of eulogies that have a profound affect all on their own and adapt them to suit the person you are remembering.
• Do not just recite a list of accomplishments and hobbies, tell the tale of the life lived and everyone who was touched by it.
• Stories can make public speaking easier on you too, particularly if you tend to get nervous.
• Share lessons the deceased taught you in life and make them new again by passing them onto others.
• Be yourself and true in character to the departed; if you often joked with or were always in awe of them, let it show in your choice of words.

Speak of what they meant to you personally and reveal the effervescence of their character with your chosen eulogy.

If the eulogy itself is true to life, the words will flow easily and emotions naturally inflict themselves in your speech. Your delivery will be poignant in its honesty and the meaning behind it felt deeply by your audience.

Tip: Finding the most appropriate words is difficult, no matter what your heart feels; do not hesitate to seek help from a professional source that specializes in helping people accomplish their goals in writing the perfect eulogy.

Preparing for the Eulogy

On the day or night before the scheduled delivery of your eulogy, there are a few ways in which you should be prepared that will allow the speech to go smoothly:

• Print a copy of the eulogy in bold font that is comfortably large for quick glances.
• Practice your eulogy out loud in a mirror or to your spouse or friend.
• Memorize the key points so that your mind has a clear path to follow with the words.
• Have a list of people to thank, particularly those who may have helped the deceased with illness or end of life difficulties.

As you get ready, keep in mind that your eulogy should not simply be a message of sorrow or loss, but of a celebration of the departed’s life. Understand the greater purpose of your speech and how it will help others to heal and remember, too.

Tip: If the guide or course you’ve chosen to help with your eulogy is strong, it should leave you well prepared and be a solid source of inspiration and confidence.

Saying a final goodby is not just about honoring the deceased, it also serves to nurture the tender emotions felt by everyone. Look for examples of eulogies that read into your heart and express exactly how people are grieving. Learn how to write a eulogy that makes it easy to savor the true essence of someone and keep their memory alive.